Teacher 2.0

I am whole-heartedly hoping that my second year of teaching will be markedly easier than my first. People often say that being a freshman educator is simply awful, but the years get better after that. I suppose I’m not in an appropriate position to make that assessment on my own just yet, but I can tell you this - in less than two days the students will return to my classroom and I feel just as anxious and uncertain as I ever have before. For now, it doesn’t feel like year two will be as breezy as I’d dreamily hoped.

With that said, at least I’ve begun to realize I should accept this moderate discomfort with the grin of experience. Sunday planning is always stressful, the actions of students, always unpredictable. The best lesson plans can fall flat, while the most unexpected teachable moments might miraculously materialize. Yes, there are best practices like backwards planning, Universal Design for Learning, and immaculate routines and procedures, but these don’t occur overnight. They are developed. Gradually implemented. Experimented with and refined. I have to accept the fact that I am always a work in progress, as a teacher and as a person, my pedagogy included.

So no - I do not know how this year will go. There are a lot of new, unfamiliar variables, and I think that is what makes it so scary. The fear that I managed to get by last year, but maybe this year I’ll meet my metaphorical demise. The worry that I’m somehow a fraud desperately casting smoke and mirrors to students and peers in a flailing effort to fool others into thinking I’m an adequate educator. But the truth is, I’m an okay teacher. I try really, really hard and that is what holds me afloat. Plus, I know I will only get better because I refuse to give up. I am always improving. I work well with others and learn whatever I can from whoever I can whenever I can. And most importantly, I love my students, hold hope for their futures, and will demonstrate endless patience on their behalf.

So maybe year two won’t be such a cinch. That’s okay though. I didn’t get into this business because I thought it would be easy, or I thought I could make a ton of money, or I thought I’d be heralded far and wide for my efforts. Why did I get into this business? Well, that’s a whole different story. For now, let’s keep it simple – I want to leave this place better than I found it.

Best of luck to all you teachers out there in 2012 - 2013.